I am the worst student in my Hebrew class.
Last night I suffered through another class. I know that my difficulties are based on a number of factors including some learning disability stuff rearing its dysfunctional head! As a kid I was identified as having some LD (learning disabilities...dyslexia etc) issues. As I matured I learned to compensated and cope and now they rarely manifest...or at least not until I have decided to make another run at Hebrew.
Another fact about my self that I beleive is more than likely some what self defeating, I am competitive and always, despite the odds against me, was an "A" student. Thus the mantel of being the Hebrew class slacker is killing me!
The Cantor of the synagogue is teaching the class. He is young and talented and very smart and quick. there are about 10 people in it. We go though our book lesson by lesson and take turns "reading." It is all going fairly smoothly until it gets to me. I feel that old rush of nervousness, I get a little shaky and attempt to sound it out. The dalet look like Resh and never mind all those dam dots that are vowels! AY...EEE OOOOO.!!! It feels like my mouth isn't working. It tries to wrap itself around the sounds and I feel like such a looser!
To add to this mortal embarrassment, I missed a class because I though it was cancelled. I had crammed and tried to get my review perfect and then I come to class and realize we are 4 lessons ahead of where I though we were.
So now I am determined. I have come up with a plan to try to be the second worst student in the class. I have identified my target, a man of similar age, (that doesn't help either, my almost 49 year old brain just doesn't fire the same at 8:15 at night like it used to!) who often confuses the the long swigly letters too. (Dalet, Resh, Nun, Vav etc)
I am going to have to study like I did as a kid. I have started making a vocabulary list, with root words, and flash cards with the letters and vowels. This is WAR!...lol
Hebrew I will master you...do you hear me?....I'm talking to you Hebrew!