Dunking Rachael: I Am Not A Sheep

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

I Am Not A Sheep

I had heard about the famous/infamous Pew Trust Forum poll. The take away I remember was that most folks didn't know about their own religion, never mind the religion of others. Additionally I remembered Jews and Atheists did the best. In fact my Rabbi even rolled that information into one of his sermons. So when today I saw on a friend's facebook post a link to their site and a with a mini poll/survey I went right to it!

http://features.pewforum.org/quiz/us-religious-knowledge/index.php

How much do you know about religion?
And how do you compare with the average American? Here's your chance to find out.
Take our short, 15-question quiz, and see how you do in comparison with 3,412 randomly sampled adults who were asked these and other questions in the U.S. Religious Knowledge Survey. This national poll was conducted by the Pew Research Center’s Forum on Religion & Public Life from May 19 through June 6, 2010, on landlines and cell phones, in English and Spanish.
When you finish the quiz, you will be able to compare your knowledge of religion with participants in the national telephone poll. You can see how you compare with the overall population as well as with people of various religious traditions, people who attend worship services frequently or less often, men and women, and college graduates as well as those who did not attend college.

now go take the test...then come back here and keep reading

I took the test and the results for me, raised Catholic, a Buddhist Unitarian Universalist who converted to Judaism, were predictable, I got all the answers right. I am not proud of this nor surprised by this, but what did shock me was how simple it was. They do a wonderful job of breaking down their data so that you can see who got questions right and wrong broken out into many different categories. I feel dismayed about the polls results. These questions were basic, nothing jumped out as esoteric or overly challenging.

And once again, my own experience with this quiz pointed out my unique conundrum....even though I do not believe I need reminding, but there it was....I fit nowhere near any majority and or any mainstream demographic group.

I spent a good amount of time when I was younger lamenting my plight of perpetual outsider when it comes to how I view the world...the shorthand I came up with was "I am not a sheep." I tend to go out there on my own, searching and questioning. But that can be a dangerous place to be and would think there is some protective energy with being just like all the other sheep. but anytime I attempted to put on sheep clothing, my true nature shown and I was found out.

So far, I must say ,the synagogue I am calling home has accepted my non sheep self. In fact in some ways I think they find it interesting. I bring life experiences and organizational experiences that can be a positive addition to our shull....I feel at home organizationally but more to the point I am home religiously and spiritually.

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Beit Din test Question #22 "If you were to join the Jewish people......."

22) If you were to join the Jewish people, what considerations would guide you to that decision? How did your course help you to recognize some meaningful ideas to Judaism? Are there some things you have learned in the course that you find difficult to accept into your life?

I have been a thinker and a seeker for most of my life. I have explored many faiths, been involved in and have a keen interest in philosophy and psychology. I was raised in an Irish/Italian Catholic home. I lived as a Buddhist/Unitarian Universalist for most of my adult life and previously was married for 20 years to a Jewish man who did not practice his faith of origin. At the birth of my child, now 19, I sought to learn as much as I could about Judaism in order to expose this child to the faith of part of her ancestors. So I come to this new point in my life with all my experiences, knowledge and aspirations.

But the question remains how did I come to consider conversion? It is though love that the door of conversion was opened. I fell in love with a Jewish man who participates in his religion, yet he did not require me to convert, pressure me, or in any way attempt to persuade or force me. This exploration of faith was of my choosing, my volition, nurtured by love.

Clearly I am not dogmatically tied to my faith of origin, seeing that the religious expressions which dominated my adult life have been mostly non-theistic. The major change/challenge for me is in the consideration/acceptance of a theistic understanding of existence. Through explorations with my sponsoring Rabbi, reading, (lots of reading!) and the Hillel class I have come to an understanding of the divine, a place of relationship with a theistic point of view that resonates within me.

To help to articulate this I refer to the work of existentialist thinker and Jewish educator Franz Rosenzweig.

“The function of religion, according to Rosenzweig, is not to erect theological systems or establish universal truths, but to lead to experience of God, starting from one's own personal existence. He "commends 'the Pharisees of the Talmud and the saints of the Church' for knowing that 'man's understanding extends only so far as his doing.' Religious observance is, in effect, the doing of one's religious convictions; the two cannot be separated."
“(Time Magizine Monday, Jan. 01, 1951 , http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,814185,00.html)

For Rosenzweig the written word was to be less important than the living exchange, for it is in the doing that the relationship to God will manifest. This idea blends well with my own mindfulness practices. These practices express that it is in the awareness of the moment, the only moment we truly have, where peace and divinity can be experienced.
Through my answers on this exam, my participation in the class and my meetings with my sponsoring Rabbi, I believe I clearly present that I am coming to know, and hopefully I am beginning to understand the meaningful ideas in relationship to Judaism. Clearly there is so much to learn, and experience.

I am most taken by the direct experience of the divine associated with taking on the laws and practices of this ancient faith. I have aspirations to practice in this tradition, but once again they can be best articulated through Rosenzweig:
“Rosenzweig’s approach was subjective also in connection with the mitzvot, Jewish observances. He did think that he would one day become a fully observant Jew, but believed in the gradual approach in which the observances slowly made their impact by “ringing a bell” for him. Typical of this approach is Rosenzweig’s answer to someone who asked him whether he wore tefillin [phylacteries]: “Not yet,” he replied.”
(My Jewish Learning.com http://www.myjewishlearning.com/history_community/Modern/IntellectualTO/Rosenzweig.htm)

Like the bell of mindfulness practice, the mitzvot, the mindfulness practice of Judaism, will take time to incorporated and to resonate within. Like the ringing of the mindfulness bell, or the sounding of the Shofar, the act of doing Judaic practices pierces the daily, the mundane and hopefully will help to awaken me to an even richer and more connective relationship with the Jewish people and the divine.